Friday, March 29, 2013



I am psyched, but I understand that some people are not yet psyched. Here is a helpful guide for those people who have not been able to shake the winter ice off of their chilly bones.

1. Listen to this song. Except, don't just listen to it. Stand up. The song starts off slow. This gives you an opportunity to warm up to what's coming. You are an icy zombie corpse waking up from a long winter. Feel the movement in your legs. Keep this up for about tw0 and a h@lf minutes. When the chorus starts, GO CRAZY! Seriously GO CRAZY! Let your body move however it wants! AAAAAAAAAA!!!!!! Okay. When the song slows down, take a breath. You haven't moved that much since last Cinco de Mayo! Listen for the words, "I'm caught up in a storm..." That's your cue! When the chorus starts, GO CRAZY AGAIN! AAUGHGH!! CAN YOU FEEL IT???????/ AAAAaaaaaaggh. Get out your crazy!!! Your soul will EXPLODE WITH 'YEAH!!'

2. IF you are like me, you seriously WENT CRAZY and now you need a cool down. Now listen to this song. Except don't just listen to it. This song isn't so jarring, so now is your chance to FLOW. SPIN around, DANCE ALL AROUND THE FLOOR. Try out those crazy BALLET MOVES you've been too scared to try. Feel the MUSIC! 'YEAH!'

3. By this point, you are probably exploding with satisfaction. You are well on your way to being psyched. You've lowered your inhibitions. Congratulations. Now it's time to meditate. Listen to this song. This time, sit down. Maybe lay on your back. Well, you can dance if you want to, but this time, you have to think about how awesome the world is! Think about your favorite places. Listen to the words! "Spring is upon us!" "The world is alive now!" "You should come back home!"

4. Okay. We're winding down here. Just one more thing to do. Listen to this song, and feel all the deepness of being human! You have love and hope and dreams! Take it all in! Just enjoy it! When you finish the song, do whatever you feel inspired to do. You are now psyched!!! Congratulations!!!

No comments: